The Lipstick Conundrum

A couple of years ago I met up with some of my old girlfriends for dinner. I hadn’t seen them in ages and wanted to look my best. It was the middle of winter and as my skin is naturally pale and hadn’t seen anything resembling sunshine in months, I reached for the fake tan. I swear by St.Tropez. If you apply it wearing gloves and have exfoliated etc beforehand, it can give you a very natural looking tan, which usually boosts my confidence.

But …later on that evening, after a few glasses of wine, one of the girls took a photo of the group. When we looked at the photo somebody commented “Helen looks SO brown!” I looked at the photo and yes, I did look very brown, no, orange! My eyebrows were even darkened by the stuff. I looked like an oompa loompa!

I think the problem was this – I had put on the tan on the morning of the event and as such, while I thought I looked naturally sun kissed in a “I’ve just popped back from the South of France” kind of way, the tan had actually had time to develop throughout the day and by the time the photo was taken I was a little overdone. It was then that I vowed to only use the fake tan a night or even two nights before an event, allowing enough time to wash the stuff off and for it to look natural.

So, once I accepted my natural paleness, I decided to embrace it! I love a strong red lipstick on others, especially those, like Dita Von Teese with beautifully pale complexions. The result is so retro and glamorous. So I figured I may as well try vamping it up myself. I went to MAC to talk to one of their makeup artists since usually I’m actually a bit scared of lipstick and only ever shove on a little of their Politely Pink (seriously, that’s what it’s called). The very helpful lady picked out a fantastic matt colour called “Ruby Woo”. Woah! Very red! We put it on and I was all lips! I liked it though.

Feeling slightly self conscious I wandered out the store, towards Pret a Manger. It was lunchtime. But, after tucking into my sandwich I nipped to the loo. There was lipstick on my chin and a weird patchy bit in the middle of my lips where most of the lipstick had been removed. It was hideous! No wonder I had some funny looks when leaving Pret.

There is obviously much to be learned about the fine art of wearing lipstick. If I go for gloss it will always, I mean always, be a windy day and I end up with my hair stuck to my lips and with bright lipstick you clearly can’t eat anything (is this why French women are so thin?)

What do you think? Any tips?

 

 

 

 

Grey Eyes

Helen Simms Illustration Grey Eyes

Antoni and Alison @ LFW 2012

Antoni and Alison Fashion Illustration by Helen Simms

I absolutely LOVE mens clothing on women – especially men’s watches and shirts and shoes! There’s something very sexy about it – perhaps its because men’s clothing doesn’t show too much flesh, or perhaps wearing men’s clothing and accessories serves to highlight our femininity – who knows? This gorgeous androgynous outfit stood out for me at Antoni and Alison’s show at London Fashion Week.

 

Brow Envy

Helen Simms brow envy

 

The people that know me really well are the ones that know just how obsessed I am with eyebrows…. and I mean seriously obsessed! Since I was, I don’t know, I guess, 12, I realised just what a big deal they are in terms of shaping and enhancing your whole face. However, unfortunately, at that age, I got hold of my Mother’s tweezers, armed with magazine pictures of popstars and actresses and just started to pluck. Ooops! Needless to say, I over plucked! My eyebrows were too short in length (I did not adhere to the old rule of holding a pencil at the side of my nose and lining it up with the edge of my eye to show the place at which my eyebrows should stop), generally over-plucked and uneven (not helped by the fact that in my teenage years I would constantly raise one eyebrow, largely because most of my friends couldn’t).

I have been paying for these early mistakes ever since and I’m sure I’m not alone. I even remember one girl at my school decided to shave (yes, shave!) her eyebrows. Gah!! Oh, how I long for big, beautiful Audrey Hepburn-esque brows!

Anyway, just over a year ago I discovered a new phenomenon known as HD Brows. It’s a 7 step process in which they do all kinds of things to your brows – including threading, dying, waxing etc. and after the year, I must say I can see a huge difference. The downside is that it’s quite pricey – (£35 a pop!) and that they recommend you completely leave your brows alone between your 6 weekly visits, which is very hard for someone as obsessed as myself : )

Anyone else got any good brow recommendations?

What is it with Geek Chic?

Helen Simms Geek Chic Illustration

 

Is it just me that’s obsessed with Geek Chic?

It’s one of those looks (like 1950s glamour) that I never seem to get bored of …. maybe it’s the allure of wearing spectacles and seeming super intelligent or maybe it’s just that there’s something very sexy about covering up – wearing blouses buttoned up right to the top and wearing our hair a la Zooey Deschannel in New Girl. I am, incidentally, thinking of getting my hair cut like hers next time I’m due for a trim, but then, that’s another story….

Edie Sedgwick

Helen Simms edie sedgwick

Helen Simms edie sedgwick

Denim!

denim